The chaotic morning dance of getting out of the house in time was more like the clunky chicken.
I'm recovering from a cold...which has highjacked some precious much needed energy...Brushed hair and teeth --and sunblock...that was my beauty regime...and every time I walked by a mirror I thought- Seriously- can't you pretend to try to get it together girl?
I went on my morning jog- excited for the opportunity to clear my head from such unnecessary vanity and 5 minutes in I run by a parked Glass and mirror truck...with 10 foot mirrors lined up along it's side--all ready to reflect and mock me...
Dirty clothes and dishelveled hair make them so painfully adorable...and me ...not so much...
My tastebuds are zapped by my cold- and somehow that has caused me to eat more for some crazy reason...craving to taste ...to feel... to experience... Each item bold in its outright blandness...jalapeno chips... nuthin... coffee....nuthin... and for dinner...sweet potato fries and roasted red pepper soup...tasted like dirty cardboard air... I must taste and feel... I need my extremes...my salty and sweet...my melancoly and happy...
Today I finally finished Parker's First Year picture book. So many memories forgotten in a blink... I always remember the First year as being so hard and so good... See? Extremes...
When I review it in pictures though- it takes the scared, overwhelmed, deflated edge completely away... And it almost makes it like it didn't exist then... Remember that next time you are hurting, friend... You will barely be able to remember this moment some day... The details will be vague...So few moments are stamped on our soul in a permanant way. I love people who have a story...people who know hurt and who have recovered...It makes you better...it makes you understand people and the World and humanity in a way that you can't if you haven't hurt...The hurt---it ain't all bad I guess.
Greyson has the ability to experience joy without a filter...
He feels... He really feels...
And watching him feel...is a constant reminder for me to feel out loud too... A reminder to never stuff the feel- inside... I laugh loud (and if you know me you know I laugh REALLY loud)... I clap, I jump up and down... I try not to censor.
The things you enjoy? It's OK to really really enjoy them.
It's OK to cry too...
Creating Parker's book reminded me that no matter what happens with him... We will be alright...We will even be good. How could a World be bad with my Parker Doodle and his many faces in it?
We all are lucky to have him.
Sometimes it's scary...sometimes it's fun... If everyday was Bliss than none of them would be...
Go conquer the World... You got this too...
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