Luckily in the past Michael and I have shared similar ideals when it comes to Valentine's Day. You can't tell me when to love, commercialized Corporate America! I don't want your overpriced flowers or your highly caloric candy. I'll celebrate love on June 24th (our Anniversary) or whenever I want, but not on February 14th. (except you have to buy me a card and write in it Michael and not just "Love, Michael".)
But something has happened to me since I've birthed these itty bitties. I've grown a little less cynical... a little softer perhaps...(and not just in the ab/tushy department). I think to myself...an extra excuse to celebrate LOVE....Why not?
I'm going to give you a tip on the absolute best gift you can ever ever give your loved one... your special someone. They need it more than they could ever know. They will cherish it, whether they know it or not. They might even thank me. I want you to give them the Gift of Truth.
It hit me the other night...I was standing around talking to some Mother's at "our" park....(I need a name for it...it's my life's Peach Pit or Central Perk.) We were discussing how bad it was that we only have pictures of our kids and our husbands with our kids..
Daddy and Bitty G on Christmas. I'm not in one single Christmas picture.
That's just not right! The Momma needs to have a strong presence in the family photo album too. We were complaining how our husbands never took pictures with us in them. I have complained about this many times before....and I realized- except for a little zinger passive aggressive comment here and there- (I rock at those) I never had a real conversation with my husband about this. I was just expecting him to read my mind. The situation is not going to change unless I change it!
So, I recently gave my husband an Early Valentine's Day gift...truth. (don't worry Michael- I got you more than that).
With God's help I got you...
Not ready for his close up today.
I told him- "I want to be in pictures too."
You have to be really specific with men. Honey, I mean- I want to be in pictures with the kids.
And now while I am "in" a moment I want photographed, I will hand him the camera and say- "Please take my picture now". Voila. Easy.
Making dinner with Parker. I especially like pictures like this of everyday nothing...which is everything to me...
I have to be willing to give a little too...like most Mother's - I HATE getting my picture taken...Vain gets in the way of Memories...so for the one I was making dinner I just said-Don't get my full face in it....Boy are women funny creatures...
Same with my yearning for more alone time. I have seriously stewed inside my head...having fake arguments with my husband- by myself. Sometimes I'm annoyed with him the second he walks in the door... He really can't win. He will say, "Do you care if I go watch the game with Brent?" and I will say "No- not at all." because I want to be a cool, laid back wife...And then I will say to my 3rd grader self..."I never get to go anywhere I want. If I wanted to go out for a couple of hours I would have had to tell him a week ago...and then while I was gone I would have to field texts from him saying things like "Parker hasn't stopped crying since you left." or "How much longer are you going to be?"
So last night, I made it really official. It's so much better to talk about this stuff when you aren't mad about it. I said, "Honey. I just need to make clear 2 things I really need from you. One is alone time...you've been really great about that lately..and thank you for letting me going running alone sometimes right when you get home from work. And, just as a reminder...I want you to take more candid pictures of me with the kids. It's really important to me." (I keep our camera out on our counter at all times so I never miss a moment I want to capture on film.)
And then I really got crazy and said, "Is there anything you need from me?"
He said he's going to think about it. Poor guy doesn't realize that offer already expired though.
So Happy Valentine's Day friend. I love that you stopped by.