Monday, May 13, 2013

I'm a good Mom because...

Happy Mother's Day... Every single one of you... Even if you aren't a Mom- you had one. We can all share and nuture and take care of the people around us. I hope you had a good day. I hope you felt special. I hope you laughed.

I got to spend today with Greyson and favorite...

Tonight we went to the park and fed the ducks...

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And I am so grateful to them for making me a Momma...

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Today I celebrated all the times they've made me laugh out loud...

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And even the times I've cried from Happy...

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Can you see the bracelet I'm wearing in this picture?

Here's a better view...

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Isn't it beautiful? A sweet Friend sent it to me for Mother's Day... It's honestly one of the most touching gifts I've ever received.

When I was working with my Graphic Design Friend making stickers for Life with Grey- I was drawn to using rainbow colors- but the symbol of a rainbow is already taken for Gay Rights-- and I needed people to know ours was a story containing Autism.

I don't like the puzzle piece which currently symbolizes Autism...I hate Autism because it can't be figured out... And the puzzle piece icon reminds me of that...It leaves me- puzzled...

 What causes Autism? What does my child need? A different special diet? More occupational Therapy? More Behavioral Therapy? What should I do next? What do I do now?

But a Rainbow is only beautiful...There's a spectrum of amazing colors...A rainbow is finding the beauty after the rain- and sometimes even during it. 

My Friend let me know that it was created by Stella & Dot specifically for Autism Awareness. I couldn't believe. In the month of April, 20% of all proceeds from their Autism Awareness Collection was donated to the Hollyrod Foundation. Over $120,000 was raised for Autism Awareness...And I couldn't believe that it was not only a rainbow-- but there wasn't a puzzle piece in sight. Although the fundraiser is over- the bracelet is still available- it's called The Spirit. This is not an advertisement for Stella & Dot- and of course I'm not getting paid to write this- but when I see a good thing- I want to share it. If you want to buy one- send me an email to and I'll hook you up with a Friend who is a Stella & Dot Stylist.

It's funny... Many of us gravitate towards and connect through similar words...

Time and time again I see the same and similar articles shared and reshared... The latest craze? You are not a bad parent because... 

And the articles are full of details and often truthful. They strike a chord. We read them and feel enough and justified and happy and heave a great big sigh a big sigh of relief...

Ahhhh, I'm not alone...maybe I'm not doing it all wrong- we think.

And a floodgate opens and relief flows freely..

But one day I thought- There's gotta be some crappy parents reading that somewhere feeling justified and better about their crappy parenting- right? So what if it doesn't apply to me? What if I am a crappy Mom?

And the articles must be broken- because a week or two later we forget that we are a good Mom- evident by the fact that we we find another article or post and read it and heave this huge sigh of relief as we realize in fact that we are not a crappy parent once again. And we are told we are wrong for getting so uptight and all we really need to do is relax... We are just supposed to love them and appreciate them and hold on tight because time goes by so fast. 

So we gratefully do... Until we forget...30 minutes later when we yell too much and don't make them eat enough vegetables and forget a practice and get take out for dinner and send grocery store cupcakes instead of homemade to school. 

The articles are great. Sometimes they get me through a day- or even better than a day- they get me through an hour...that hour...The excruciating hour before Michael gets home- the hour Grey has pulled down his pants and peed on the carpet 3 times (true story), the hour that Greyson pushed over Parker and then in slow motion and I see him hit him on the stomach in such a way that makes me want to throw up- and I think that everything I've ever done up to this point must be wrong because that just happened.

Man oh man- it's hard. That hour.

And if it isn't hard- you have a cleaning lady and 3 nannies and drivers and thinkers and worriers and carers....

If it isn't hard- you don't care...

But if you do care- it's hard as Hell...That simple.

And if it is mind numbingly- heart achingly hard...and heart burstingly, stomach hurt from laughing- amazing- then we are all doing it right...and you don't need some article to tell you that...You don't need me to tell you that either, Friend.

You need you to tell you that. You need you to believe it with some amount of longevity longer than the amount of time it takes for the next - You're not a bad parent because...article to come out. You need to believe it. 

You absolutely need to believe it so that you can teach them to believe in themselves by your example. So that you can teach them confidence and self worth and the satisfaction of a job well done.

We celebrate our babies and cherish them and help them to make good choices- and hope we plant that seed inside that will teach them how to Love themselves too...

To make that happen- we've gotta trust and love ourself first...

I'm so tired of not feeling like a bad mom because some article that's never met me tells me I'm not. I need to know I'm a good Mom- because I actually am... Because I never give up. Because I notice and celebrate the details. Because I know how to have fun. Because I know how to love and express myself...

Why are you a good Parent? You may not continue to read until you have paused and given this serious consideration and some answers.

God created a sacred and special union between me and my babies... And constantly doubting and questioning myself as a Mother is like questioning God's very creation.


Children are the greatest gifts in the world. Gifts that poop and scream and yell and do bad things and are imperfect and make me question my sanity and make me doubt my ability to Mom. Daily...sometimes hourly.

But I just have to believe I'm doing it right more often than not. It means accepting that doing it right is going to involve some doing it wrongs too. Maybe wrongs are all part of doing it right...

You already have everything you need inside to be the greatest Mom... God paired you with your children for a reason. All you need to do is tap into that...


This post is dedicated to the woman who showed me how to Mom- My Mom, Joan.

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We love you Mom!

Come say hello on Facebook. I'm a real life girl and I like hearing from you. 

Have a great Day... 




  1. So glad you had a good Mother's Day.
    Love & happiness to you, sweet mama. <3 Jennifer

  2. Happy belated Mother's Day, Chrissy!! Another beautifully written post.. Hugs to you.