Tuesday, July 30, 2013

driving the bus

Ladies and gentlemen, the Captain has turned on the Fasten Seat Belt sign. If you haven't already done so, please stow your carry-on luggage underneath the seat in front of you or in an overhead bin. Or, better yet, feel free to just get rid of your baggage. Don't let your tough childhood or your current hardships weigh you down. My name is Chrissy and I'm your chief attendant flying on Life Airlines, non-stop to Heaven. Flight times will be different for each one of us, so please, make your own flight count. Try not to compare your flight to others. If it starts to feel too hard or too long, break your journey down into days...even minutes if that is what works best for you.

We will be crossing zones filled with turbulence and storms. If the Captain turns on the Fasten Seat Belt sign, please return to your seats and keep your seat belt fastened. It's okay to be scared, that's the only way to also be brave. Don't be afraid to ask for help. Try not to overthink or question the turbulence, just ride it through. It will all work out in the end. It always does. We will also be going through areas free of turbulence, with clear and smooth flying and beatiful views. Don't forget to take it all in.

Yes, the bathrooms are tiny, the windows are small, the air is stale and the food is mediocre. Pay no attention to that because you will miss out on the good. You are surrounded by amazing people, you get to relax, and you are on an incredible machine that can take you anywhere in the world you want to go.

Oxygen and air pressure are always being monitored. In the event of decompression, an oxygen mask will automatically appear in front of you. If you are traveling with a child or someone who requires assistance, secure your mask on first, and then assist the other person.


I'm so glad you're here! It was just about the time I become a horrible mother, I said to Liv the sitter when she arrived earlier this evening.

The husband travels for work a few days every week and the bewitching hours are often absolutely unbearable. I know in advance that I don't have it in me this week- so I asked for help. I put the oxygen mask on me so I can be the best Mom I can. At times I have to remind myself- Chrissy, you come first.  


One day I realized that I couldn't change the fact that my sons have Autism, so I decided instead that I would just have to change the world. And I am. And it's much easier than being angry about autism daily. We have our moments, but they are only moments...not forevers. And you are here helping to change the world just by reading and by sharing. Thank you.

If its not too soon, I'd like to say I love you.

I want to change hearts and minds, two eyes at a time. I want to start a revolution of awareness and goodness. The world needs it. I think this world needs LESS Weiners and MORE Franks. What do you think?

I went to physical therapy this morning to help with a chronic headache. Shoulders up to my ears, stress, Life. You know the drill. After I checked in I was given my chart to carry to the back. I saw a post it hanging out of mine, so of course I read it.

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And I couldn't stop laughing. At my last Doctor's appointment, the physician recommended this specific Physical Therapy office. He called while I was there to make sure I could be seen by one therapist in particular. Doc said, I have a patient right here, and I don't think she'd mind if I described her as an active, Type A, busy Mom of two. She has a packed schedule but is willing to do the work. He was correct, I didn't mind at all being described that way, I'm often quite proud of my Type A-ness. (Uh oh, don't say that last word out loud). But seeing it in my chart really made me laugh.

I always drive the bus. I could blame it on autism- but the fact is- I was the bus driver well before I even had children. I'm picky, I'm a pain in the ass, I'm particular. I won't ask you to do it because I need it done exactly the way I need it done and instead of explaining it to you- it's just easier for me to do it myself... I say to justify my actions. Sometimes I ask Michael to do something, and by the time I'm done explaining EXACTLY how it needs to go down- he is still just sitting there, not even in a little bit of a hurry. So I go do it myself because he already took too long.

Despite being a Monday, today Everything was my favorite. Taking the boys to Speech Therapy is something I honestly look forward to. It's exciting. You never ever know when a milestone is just around the corner.

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Today Greyson got to learn how to drive the bus. Just like his Mom.

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And today after almost 4 months of potty training... Four months of on the potty practically every single hour... 4 months of a zillion accidents (please pause now for a moment of silence to feel sorry for me) Greyson had an insanely amazing day on the pot. All day long when he had to go, he would just go into the restroom ALL ON HIS OWN. No accidents. I couldn't believe my eyes. I would see him dart in there and I would hold my breath in silence. Hopeful.

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Now those of you living with Autism (heck- or a toddler) know that this could be the new normal, or just a day that things were easy and good. Either way, it's all gonna be okay.

Headed to bed to reality-tv and refuel.

Cabin Crew, please prepare for gate departure. Doors on automatic, cross-check and report. Thank you. Please don't forget to enjoy your flight.

Minute to minute flight updates and arrivals on FACEBOOK.


  1. First time caller, long time listener. You always seem to resonate with our day to day. But today, today every single word of every paragraph I needed to read. Thank you, if anything you've given me the security to get up and face it all over again tomorrow. It may not be better tomorrow but it will be eventually!

  2. I Am New Here, I Do Follow On Facebook Also. Is It Too Soon To Say I Love You Too? Your Writing Style Is Delicious And I Look ForwardTo More Like Dessert! iI Can't Wait Till The Next Ride, And I'm Glad You're Driving This Time!

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  4. Funny I never thought of myself as a type A personality, but alas I have to admit I AM! I learned something new today from you. I learned to finally accept that I am who I am and that is ok.
    Than you for always saying what I need to hear,

  5. Thank you for reminding me what I remind others on a daily basis. Put the oxygen mask on yourself first. I really needed that reminder before starting my day. I'm so glad you see self-care as an important part of doing everything you can for your kids. Praying the pottying keeps going well.

  6. What an amazing day you had! I love your stories...you are truly an amazing person and mom. Your motivation has made me realize I am missing some of the good...by fretting about the bad. Not today!

  7. I don't know how I made my way to your blog this morning but God must have been directing my path because this is exactly where I needed to be. God is so good and smart and when we can't find our way, He lights our path. be it literal or through the internet. God had something to say to me this morning and YOU were His messenger. My son is 12 and was recently diagnosed with PDD-NOS or as you know high functioning Autism and OCD. The last year and a half have been the most difficult because he has learned how to manipulate us with his diagnosis and because well we have had to completely change the way we interact with him and react TO him. It has been very difficult because I am you, or very much like you. I am Active- Type A and I need things done the way you need things done. I was reading your blog and it was as if you were pouring out my truths on the page. Yesterday my son left with out permission and refused to come home. I had to call the police. It was the culmination of a summer of increasingly defiant behavior and I have been looking for alternate temporary placement for him. Your latest entry gave me an opportunity to gain some perspective, to take a step back, to put on my oxygen mask and to take care of me. I'm all about natural consequences so my son as brilliant and stubborn as he his got the privileged of sleeping in a tent in the backyard. I needed the break, he needed the lesson and where we will go from here I don't know. But I want to say thank you for loving me. Thank you for lending your support, thank you for your willingness to take on one of lifes most challenging jobs, parenting and for following what God has called you to do. He has called you to share, to inspire, to offer hope and effect change. You have done all of those for me on this sunny July morning and again I say THANK YOU!

  8. HOORAY! for good potty days! I remember struggling with my son forEVER with potty training. He was right around 4 when it seemed to click. It seemed one day he was pottying in his pants and having toys taken away & he could care less then the very next day he was over it and never looked back. I hope this is the path you are on!
    Now let's talk about your A-ness - c'mon! you the wordsmith couldn't avoid that one? How bout A-ity? or A-ishness? I laugh when someone says duty, regardless of the setting - professional, school, doesn't matter. You are the first person to talk about your A-ness but that makes me laugh, too.
    I love this place, for sooo many reasons, & love you too :)
    Love & happiness to you, sweet Momma. Jennifer

  9. less weiners, more franks... that is awesome and so true! Love reading your words!

  10. Chrissy, i love you too! XXX Congrats on the great day on the Potty!!! :-)