Monday, October 20, 2014

mary friggin poppins

Friend, How many more days until the weekend?

Yes, yes, I know it just ended but Michael was out of town working a pharmaceutical convention from Thursday to Sunday and I was home flying solo. He stayed at The Wynn and had room service every night! Doesn't that sound AMAZING?! Let's all take a minute to feel sorry for me. 

I was DREADING flying solo for days leading up to his trip. Weekend days are even more intimidating because I have no therapy or therapists to fall back on. 

Single parents- You are my hero. 

But we did it. We really did it. And it wasn't NEARLY as bad as I was making it out to be in my mind. I totally channeled Will from About a Boy.  


"The important thing in island living is to be your own activities director. I find the key is to think of a day as units of time, each unit consisting of no more than thirty minutes. Full hours can be a little bit intimidating and most activities take about half an hour. Taking a bath: one unit, watching countdown: one unit, web-based research: two units, exercising: three units, having my hair carefully disheveled: four units. It's amazing how the day fills up, and I often wonder, to be absolutely honest, if I'd ever have time for a job; how do people cram them in?"

Something about that quote has always stuck with me and now I know why. Ah ha! I needed it this loooong weekend. Thirty minute units were too intimating- too many to fill. Instead I broke the days into hour long chunks.

Taking a bath. One unit. 

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Watching Blue's Clues: One unit. 

Playing at the park... One and a half units.

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This picture stopped my heart. Every time he looks at me- I mean like really looks at me tears spring up in my eyes and my throat gets tight. Hey, I know you, I think. I smile back at him almost shyly, partly standing firmly in the moment and partly hoping it lasts forever.


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He kept going down the slide like this. I say- anything that takes extra energy and makes you fall asleep faster this evening- SIGN ME UP.



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Parker is a roamer, so sometimes I let him roam in wide open spaces while I follow closely behind. (Also see note above about GETTING ENERGY OUT ANY WAY WE CAN).

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Right after this picture he scooped up some disgusting water floating in the fountain and drank it. Immunity boosting.

We examined leaves...

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And climbed trees.

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And threw dirt. Because they refuse to just stand there idly and look adorable.

When we went to leave Greyson started to run away. I was so (SOOOO) done running. I was sweating. I was angry. I was going to put Parker into his car seat and then run and grab Grey- but Parker began to tantrum because he didn't want to go in his car seat. He was screaming so hard my throat hurt for him, he was as stiff as a 2 x 4 and no matter what I did I couldn't get him to bend to snap on his seat belt.

I was at that moment, and I knew I was at that moment. I was shaking with rage. I wanted to spank EVERYONE. I wanted to scream and yell so loud that people turned their heads- and at that moment I honestly wouldn't have cared at all. I DARE YOU TO STARE AT ME. I started breathing deeply. I looked over the side of the ledge- going ape shit with the boys was SO enticing. But I knew I would feel like a horrible person afterwards.

So made myself stop and regroup. I pretended like I was watching a friend's children. YES! These were my friends (terribly behaved) children. When it's not your own kid going crazy- it doesn't push those emotional buttons like it does for your own blood. I got into it. I was an amazing actor and I was Mary Friggin Poppins calm and cheery. A programmed nurturing robot. I was even smiling while they screamed which I'm sure looked hilarious.


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We made it out alive. Next stop: Jamba Juice smoothies and sitting in the parking lot OUTSIDE of the car seat- One unit. 


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They think roaming around the car is a sister of Disney Land. Sometimes we will go sit in the car in the driveway and they think we are actually playing (and because they think that- we are!)

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I shared this picture on my Facebook Page along with the words: This picture is a great conversation starter to use with your kids. "If you saw this boy playing alone during recess- what would you do?" People with autism usually lack the social skills typical children possess- but often still long to have friends and be included.

Sometimes on the weekend I like to pass the time on school playgrounds because they are always deserted. Sometimes I want to be outside but I need a break. I don't want to constantly remind Parker that he has to wait his turn- or tell Greyson to stop climbing UP the slide while someone is waiting to come down. This way- they can play however the heck they want to play and I can just sit there for at least 83 seconds in a row.

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We passed the rest of our weekend playing and relaxing.

Now we are all back together and life is good. I still believe in happily ever after once I figured out "happy" and "perfect" aren't synonyms.

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Much Love,

Chrissy (Michael, Greyson and Parker)

9 comments:

  1. Hi Chrissy, I work as a nanny for 2 little active boys. I do 10 hour days. I do the 'break down into unit" thing too. It works! Also even though they are not my kiddies, I love them so much that I can relate to the 'don't snap' whilst putting them in their car seat thing. I have shouted once or twice and felt DOUBLY bad, cause isn't the nanny not allowed to yell? Love your blog. Tania in Australia

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  2. Amazing strength and patience and I love you

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  3. I have literally had to SIT on my 3 year old to get him in the car seat when he pulls the stiff as a board crap! LOL! -K

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  4. Lisa from Tennessee, currently in ColoradoOctober 21, 2014 at 7:56 AM

    Yay you for making it through with your sanity intact! (Mostly intact counts!!!) Love the family picture!

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  5. Love your family selfie! Weekends alone are h.a.r.d.!!

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  6. Hi Crissy! So understand. My husbands a paramedic and works 48hr and 24hr shifts. Ugggg. Looonnngg. Anyway, I was wondering, have you ever thought about writing childrens books? Something that would give "typical" kids an understanding of autism? I have thought about this a lot but writing is not my gift (as you can probably tell HA!). Just an idea.

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  7. My hubby has to travel sometimes too and the weekend trips are the worst. But I too feel like the anticipation and dread before he leaves is the worst part. Once I'm in it I kind of turn into super mom and find strength I didn't know I had. Sounds over dramatic but it is hard to be alone! I lose my cool all too often when both mine are being crazy at once, but thankfully their little hearts the best kind of forgiving. Love your writing!

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  8. You have the greatest sense of humor. Love the photos.

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