Is the glass half empty or half full?...
Neither...It's grab a different, better, smaller glass and fill it all the way up, baby.
I work daily to live my life like that. To change old or negative patterns of thinking when I need to. I don't always wake up feeling all Mary Poppins-y. My positive muscle is located in my brain and I work it daily to strengthen it, just like you would to strengthen any other muscle. I have off days, and when I do, I feel it, just like I would with any other muscle. It doesn't come naturally to me at all times, but I want it to...and so I work at it...
Andy Warhol said it good..."Why do people spend their time being sad, when they could be happy?" Is it that simple, I wonder?...Sometimes...I think it is.
Now that I have a child on the Spectrum, I have alot more to worry about...but guess what? I don't. I actually worry a little less now. That doesn't mean I never worry now- I just worry
less. I used to have to make up stuff to worry about. Add that to "Passive Aggressive comments" on the list of
Things I'm Great at.
Of course if I could wave my magic wand, Greyson would be a typically developing little boy....But I have no such wand, so my only other choice is to deal with what I do have.
We are not just going to deal with life though..We will embrace it. We will find the good in it.
If I was looking for bad, I could find it. I'm not looking for it. Whatever you are looking for....you will find it.
Look for good stuff.
This World of Autism has enlightened me. It took something bad to happen for me to realize that I have it all. Present tense, I still do. I don't know quite why, but I am truly happier now. Greyson has opened my eyes to a whole new World.
If you need it, I want to help you find that same enlightenment without something bad happening first. I don't think I could have been capable of that...I was too caught up in what I had...what I wished I had..what I had that I didn't want. Caught up in wanting wood floors instead of my ugly tile ones...caught up in silly things that would have no merit on my mental list of priorities in life.
If I thought that Greyson having Autism was a death sentence and the end of the World...guess what? It would have been. And that belief would trickle down to Greyson, and his life and his happiness would be less than. It's my job to make it more than...not less.
That is why I work my positive muscle.
It's funny- the life I mourned when I realized Greyson was on the Spectrum...The one where he was social and popular....he was the Captain of the football team? A straight A student- Guess what, I was none of those things for my parent's. And guess what? They still loved me, they still gave me a good life and they still got the chance to brag about me to their friends.
I think what we want in life is so simple.....but sometimes we forget and think it is complicated.
I was running Monday night and there was the most spectacular sunset. It was neon pink and fiery orange and sweet smelling baby blue with cotton candy white clouds and I thought to myself- oh man, I wish I had my camera to take a picture…and it made me think-why? And then I thought- because it’s so beautiful, and then I thought- yes, but why? And then I realized --it’s because it makes me feel happy when I look at it…and then I thought about it all and I realized that’s all that any of us wants --is to be happy…that’s all we are really going for… I mean- Would I like a hundred million dollars? SURE! Why? Because I like stuff and money gets you stuff and I'm not gonna lie...Stuff makes me happy. See?! There it is again- that happiness thing… And that's all I want for Grey...for him to be happy. Like you want for your babies. Like you deserve for yourself.
So I say- Do whatever it is that makes you HAPPY! I don’t care what it is, I won’t judge you…whether it’s getting fake boobs, or rearranging your room, or going to church…(are you allowed to put "fake boobs" near "Church" in a sentence? Only if it makes you happy.)
Happiness….it’s all we are really looking for.
As parents we worry so much...so much about our babies, their health, money, our jobs..we worry about why we said that stupid thing in front of so and so...we worry that our pants are getting too tight, that we don't work out enough, that we don't measure up to others, that we should go to church more, or eat less chocolate or eat more fruit, or switch from milk to soy, or spend less...and so on.... and so much of it is such a waste of that beautiful Real Estate up there in your head. Today I am putting my foot down on worry, cuz I for one am sick of it.
I am declaring today and tomorrow, a happy, worry free day. Put it on your calendar. February 21st/22nd. Tell your friends. Forward them a link to this blog. Put it on your Facebook. Tell your brain you don't need it to be in overdrive today.
Tell your worries you will get back with them Thursday. It's time to get Happy.
Please help me to continue to share this message and this blog with the World. I can't do it without your help.
And, let's be friends....find me on
Facebook or send me an email kellyc43@gmail.com. While you're at it- will you pretty please become a Member- over there on the right? I get a million dollars for each member....just kidding...I get HAPPY. When I need it, I look at it to remind myself that I am not in this alone on this journey of Life!
I like that tomorrow is happiness day too...husband turns 40 tomorrow...and he is a big chunk of my happiness!!
ReplyDelete40! I love it. Still a young pup with a hottie younger wife ;-) Happy Non-Saint Patrick's BirthDay.
DeleteThis post made me cry. It's so true...we need to stop worrying about the little stuff that doesn't really matter in the end. This is something I need to work myself. :)
ReplyDeleteWe will work on it together, Momma friend! You are allowed to work out your positive muscle even when pregnant! I'm SO glad you enjoyed that post and am so glad that you made me a pretty rainbow for it.
DeleteYou made Greyson's spectrum-ness pretty.
Incredibly well said as always, my friend! I can't wait to catch up in person someday soon and witness this unbelievably positive momma in action. And see the boys of course, too! All 3 of them...
ReplyDeleteI LOVE optimists like you that have stayed at the Hermosa Kelly home AND filled out a comment card.
DeleteMissing our Coyote Nights sumpthin fiece! THANK YOU for reading!
So so true! Great post! My happiness muscle needs to be flexed right this minute.
ReplyDeleteI say you add that to the Aerobics routine!!!
DeleteAmazing once again something to work on everyday for me! You are awesome!
ReplyDeleteAlicia- I thought of you today when writing, I think of you often! Your children and husband hit the Mommy/Wife JACKPOT. Thank you for reading!!!
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