Thursday, May 30, 2013
Most days I am begging God to make time go faster... Especially between the hours of 4:30-7:30pm...I'm counting down the minutes until they are in bed and I am alone...And then I look through my pictures...
And suddenly I am begging time to slow down... God must be so confused.
People who want to leave this world a better place are awesome. I'm selfish though- I want the world to be a better place while I'm still here. That's part of the reason I'm so happy you are here listening...I want to shed a light on Autism and anyone that feels different...If I can make one world better than I am happy. So far this place has made our world overflow with love and support and acceptance. It has certainly made our world a better place.
I've had numerous signs from the universe that I am no longer young or hip. I'm certain once upon a time I was at least one of those. The other day Grey's therapist mentioned that we didn't have any turn taking games. They are great tools to teach Greyson how to interact with others, how to play games and how to wait your turn. No turn taking games?! I can fix that! I love love love problems that I can actually fix! And last night I excitedly searched Amazon for appropriate games. Why buy one turn taking game when you can get four!?
Buying games from Amazon suddenly made me feel like I was retail therapy-ing AND kicking autism's butt in one fell swoop. As a Mom- being able to find ways to help is the greatest feeling in the World-- because there are so many moments...so many times there's nothing you can do and it can feel paralyzing.
And today I was so excited- waiting and checking to see if our package had shipped yet. It's like these games are Manalo Blahniks and I'm Carrie Bradshaw.
So not hip.
Today I picked up the boys from therapy and on the way home a song came on. An incredibly annoying song with a constant repetition of chorus.
We're up all night to get ugly.
We're up all night to get...ugly?
Is that really what they are saying? So I turned up the radio to listen harder and it hit me.
We're up all night to get lucky.
They kept saying over and over again...
Woah- I'm pretty certain my 20-something self would have detested this song but this 30-something girl finds it HILARIOUS. Up all night to get lucky? That's impossible- because the very definition of getting lucky is sleeping all night uninterrupted- therefore it's just not possible to be up all night and to get lucky all at the same time.
My song would be something like:
I'm up all night because Michael's snoring.
I'm up all night because Greyson doesn't want to sleep in his own bed.
I'm up all night because Jack the dog wants to go outside.
I'm up all night because Belle the dog needs a drink of water.
Not very catchy of a jingle though- is it? Ill stick to taking pictures.
The Moms who write those - Don't miss out on their childhood by being on your phone pieces clearly never tried to poop train their toddler. It's excruciating.
Greyson is poo-dini. The second he feels the inkling of a poo he's hiding and gone. My first thought is usually- ahhhh- it's so quiet and relaxing at this moment- and my second thought is- OH NO WHERE IS GREYSON?!!!
So now when he first disappears- I bust him before any secret pooping can happen and I bring him to the bathroom...
I've spent so many accumulated hours waiting.
Sitting on the floor...waiting... All of us...
The 4 of us...waiting... Me, Greyson, Parker and the pig... Sometimes Belle the dog comes in and waits too.
I keep the piggy bank in there so Greyson can put coins in to pass the time...keeping his hands and mind occupied...
I'm like a (terrible) master negotiator in the FBI.
If you go poo poo in toilet we can go in car.
If you go poo poo I'll give you a whole chocolate bar.
If you go poo poo in toilet we can go to pool!
His eyes flashed light for just an instant - pool he repeated.
Ah ha!!! I found his weakness. The pool...OK- You go poo poo- We go to pool!!! First poo poo- Then pool.
And then for what felt like years I waited and barked out orders...
Stop flushing the toilet
No touch wiener
Go poo poo
Leave toilet paper alone
First poo poo then flush
First poo poo then pool
Hands off butt
No more flush
And I waited...and waited and waited...
So we decided to go to the damn pool regardless...
And I changed my battle from- Poo poo in toilet to --Pants on at pool... I was finally ready to fight that one... I needed to redeem my ego...
And it was such a relief to be out of that bathroom that I didn't care that I never heard that melodic plop in the water...
Plus he was happy...Which usually means so am I...
I caught him numerous times- trying to unrobe...
PANTS ON!!! I'd yell out...Thrilled with myself for catching him...
And while I was diligently policing Greyson...
Opps...It might just have to be a whole naked Summer...
Greyson exploring shadows and the sun...Fascinated.
Poo'ing in the toilet is serious business to that gal waiting on the bathroom floor. Sometimes she takes it all so seriously... And the girl staring at the screen now can't help but sigh and smile... There will always be a phase to get past... A phase in life, centered around children or self... I guess we are lucky that way- it means we are alive.
And although I suspect he was not talking about poo-training-- Sigmund Freud said, One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful.
Swish that thought around about your Life... It's true.
at 10:35 PM