Sometimes you feel like no one understands you. Sometimes you feel lonely inside your own head. Sometimes you think that you are the only one that thinks that way or feels that way or says that or does that. Oh Friend, I understand you, of course I do. I understand that life can be so exquisite, and also so excruciating. Sometimes even in the very same day.
Come here, get comfortable and just be you. You don't have to pretend.
I feel so much. Sometimes it feels like too much. All of my feelings are right up at the surface. Sometimes I can't separate them from what's real. I think. I think and feel and feel and think. I swear I must have been the only constantly thinking newborn.
That lady is nice. I think she's called Mom. What if she goes away? What if she forgets to feed me? When will I walk? Are other babies my age walking? Do I have hair yet? My feet are cold. What will I do for a living when I grow up? Where did the Mom lady go?
Shhhhh, I often tell my mind. It's okay to feel that much. It can be a beautiful thing. But there's no need to think that much. Everything- all of it- it's gonna okay. It's even gonna be more than okay sometimes.
The good thing about the heat, is that it doesn't feel like the heat anymore. It just feels like normal life. We are getting used to it and we are grateful that we get to cool off in the pool.
I believe good wins.
Today was Trash Truck Wednesday. We heard the roar of the engine and went to wait outside. But this time was different. Today instead of just waiting for a truck, I was waiting for a friend.
I see Frank turn down our street...
He stops his truck, pulls out his ear plugs and exists his cab. Our eyes meet and all I could do was smile. I ran to greet him we had a reunion. I was finally able to give him that hug, and I just held on tight...for me and for Grey and for every single one of you that believe that good wins too. He really hugged me back too.
The extra special thing about Frank - Frank gets it. The exquisiteness and excruciatingness of it all. He gets all of it. And in the past few days I've had the pleasure of exchanging emails with he and his wife. They are such good people.
There was a measure in a recent election being proposed to privatize local trash pick up, and I'm sure Frank and his colleagues had real fears about losing their jobs. The measure was defeated, however he shared with me that morale in his department had been low. He actually thanked me, and said this story brought the whole department back together and brought back a sense of pride in what they did. All thanks to a boy and a man and his truck and goodness.
Life isn't a solitary game. This interaction has reminded me that it's best enjoyed in the company of others. Thank you Frank for that reminder.
And thank you for reading and for being here, Friend- and thank you for getting it too.
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