I take deep breaths and repeat cliches over and over like a lullaby.
This too shall pass
When the going gets tough, the tough gets going
I don't believe me though. Because the chaos is so much bigger than the calm. I hit the packing wall today. The beginning was so easy. Each box filled with large items made such a big difference to a room. I am getting somewhere fast. I am awesome. This is easy.
But now. We are down to the end. Which is kind of the beginning too. This is taking forever. Our house is a pit. I suck. One shelf of the pantry can somehow fill up 11 boxes. And the boxes that once were perfectly categorized and labeled are now pure mish-mosh. "Dog leashes. Vitamins. Over-sized cookie sheet. Butt wipes."
The good news is- boxes are so much fun.
My friends Heather and Wynema came over to help pack today. (Which by the way is the nicest, most incredible thing people can offer really.That and coffee.) And as soon as they got here I just couldn't pack. I wanted to sit and talk and drink coffee and talk and talk and talk until my house felt familiar and warm again. My walls are bare of pictures and they echo. I feel like I'm breaking up with my home- but I still love it. I was feeling so floating and lost.
Do you want me to start in the pantry? Wynema asked. No- let's go upstairs and sit and talk for a bit first. And then Heather brought Starbucks, and a bit turned into the whole morning. The funny thing is- of course we could always use help packing. But at that time- I needed their spirit and our laughter much, much more to help me with our move. And that they provided. That's the great thing about good friends, they just show up and do what needs to be done.
Besides- picture taking is SO much more fun than packing.
Today we had our last official Trash Truck Wednesday. It's hard to breathe when I write that. Too much change. And although our new home will no longer be in Frank's route- he will be a block away on Mondays- so he will still stop by every week to see us.
And it will be the same- but it will be different too. It's the end of an era and that makes me sad. We love you Frank.
(for those of you new here- check out this beautiful story about Greyson and Frank. I don't think this works from a mobile device.)
And I want everything to stay the same always. But if everything stays the same- we will never grow- so I have to accept change as the cost of growth.
For 2014 I came up with three words I wanted to motivate me throughout the year. I picked: learning, adventure and giving. Each month I made sure to contribute to each category. I contributed in big and small ways and held myself accountable. I want us BOTH to do it again this year. Are you in?
You must write them down. You may even want to buy a new blank notebook for your little 2015 project. As a little girl I remember my Dad telling me about a 1979 Harvard MBA Study. Interviewers asked graduates about their goals. Of the graduates:
84% had no goals
13% had goals-but only in their head
3% had clear, written goals and plans to accomplish them.
Ten years later these students were interviewed again. The 13% with goals not committed to paper were earning twice as much as the 84% who had no goals at all. And the 3% with clear, written goals- were earning ten times as much as the other 97% PUT TOGETHER. Pretty amazing-right?
I think you and I should challenge each other to write down our words that we plan on guiding us in the next year. I say we be the 3%.
I finally got out of my packing funk this afternoon. When I stopped saying- Stop being so lazy, you are NEVER going to get anything done, that left room for a little grace instead. This is hard, but you can do it. It will be over soon- I said instead and I dug into some of that energy that my friends provided earlier. I cranked some music, and I packed. I created my own little calm amongst the chaos. I guess that's what we have to do.
Happy New Year to YOU. I am so inspired by your stories and your love. Thank you for being here. I'm so glad we get to do 2015 together.
So much Love,